another good informative read about the s3xual habits of bears, highly recommend
So you're in the wild, toasting marshmallows with your family and telling ghost stories, and out of nowhere a great, big grizzly bear approaches. I know, your initial instinct will be to give that bear a handjob. DO NOT. Try as hard as you can NOT TO GIVE THAT BEAR A HANDJOB.
Here's why: 1. Bears love handjobs. It's their favorite thing. But when a bear receives a handjob, upon reaching beargasm, they will instantly demand another. "MOAR HANDJOBS," they'll roar. It's not like when humans receive handjobs and they subsequently feel terrible about themselves because nobody really enjoyed what just happened. Bears can't get enough, and if you don't comply to their request for round two, they will retaliate by taking your child out for ice-cream, but then telling them they have to order the coffee flavor.
When being pleasured by a hand, the bear will try to make eye contact with you. Avoid this at all costs. The moment you lock eyes, you will be mentally transported to your most cherished childhood memory. From then on, when you visualize that memory, you will permanently see image of a bear receiving handjob in the background.
As mentioned last time, a beargasm lasts precisely 23 minutes. But what you might not know is that it takes three months for them to get off. Please see reason number one for as to why this is an unfortunate reality.
Bears are known gossips. If they're pleased with your performance, they will undoubtedly tell every bear they know and you will the sl ut of the forest. "It was a one time thing," you'll say when bears begin calling you at home and you have to explain yourself to your wife, who has already judged you for the time you performed cunnilingus on a dolphin.
During day 38 of your bearjob, the bear's face will begin to resemble your deceased grandfather. This will make the following 52 days a nightmare. Unless that's your thing. In that case, enjoy yourself. But at least call your grandma to apologize when you're done.
anal is the best way to prevent babies. the first question i ask on the first date is "are you into anal?" if the answer is no, im gone. could be in the middle of dinner, or a walk on the beach. if they say no, i go. if they dont like anal i put on my flannel. simple as that. and oral isnt a substitution. i can do that by myself. the key is to put your biceps under your thighs and push yourself together like a waffle maker. once you get the tip you'll want to keep at it.
i was so damn excited when i saw it in pokemon red (i think? actually it was probably later generation but google doesnt work for me for some reason atm) with those other two legendaries as he flew down from the sky between them
i just played a game where enemy tinker was laughing every 5-10 secs for no reason until i muted him
what the actual fuck
like i was going crazy his laugh is super triggering + i didn't understand what the fuck is happening
I'll make the offical C ayy lmao stack. We're going to be the subs for the subs ayy lmao stack. We're the third wheel of the thread. Also im also convinced that aimstronk is gay.
another good informative read about the s3xual habits of bears, highly recommend
So you're in the wild, toasting marshmallows with your family and telling ghost stories, and out of nowhere a great, big grizzly bear approaches. I know, your initial instinct will be to give that bear a handjob. DO NOT. Try as hard as you can NOT TO GIVE THAT BEAR A HANDJOB.
Here's why: 1. Bears love handjobs. It's their favorite thing. But when a bear receives a handjob, upon reaching beargasm, they will instantly demand another. "MOAR HANDJOBS," they'll roar. It's not like when humans receive handjobs and they subsequently feel terrible about themselves because nobody really enjoyed what just happened. Bears can't get enough, and if you don't comply to their request for round two, they will retaliate by taking your child out for ice-cream, but then telling them they have to order the coffee flavor.
When being pleasured by a hand, the bear will try to make eye contact with you. Avoid this at all costs. The moment you lock eyes, you will be mentally transported to your most cherished childhood memory. From then on, when you visualize that memory, you will permanently see image of a bear receiving handjob in the background.
As mentioned last time, a beargasm lasts precisely 23 minutes. But what you might not know is that it takes three months for them to get off. Please see reason number one for as to why this is an unfortunate reality.
Bears are known gossips. If they're pleased with your performance, they will undoubtedly tell every bear they know and you will the sl ut of the forest. "It was a one time thing," you'll say when bears begin calling you at home and you have to explain yourself to your wife, who has already judged you for the time you performed cunnilingus on a dolphin.
During day 38 of your bearjob, the bear's face will begin to resemble your deceased grandfather. This will make the following 52 days a nightmare. Unless that's your thing. In that case, enjoy yourself. But at least call your grandma to apologize when you're done.
?_?
pretty meh pasta, kinda panders to the casual reddit crowd and not actual pasta connoisseurs, but since its bear related i pasted it
solid contraception advice
anal is the best way to prevent babies. the first question i ask on the first date is "are you into anal?" if the answer is no, im gone. could be in the middle of dinner, or a walk on the beach. if they say no, i go. if they dont like anal i put on my flannel. simple as that. and oral isnt a substitution. i can do that by myself. the key is to put your biceps under your thighs and push yourself together like a waffle maker. once you get the tip you'll want to keep at it.
?
I can do that myself ayyy
uebok uebani
im pretty sure folding ur spine like that would lead to serious issues later on
si si senior hola kepasos muchachos ales amigos delevegos JAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA viva peru
andale andale
i was so damn excited when i saw it in pokemon red (i think? actually it was probably later generation but google doesnt work for me for some reason atm) with those other two legendaries as he flew down from the sky between them
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ye das me
thanks for notifying me of this day todays archeesy stream
Are you a girl?
ich bin blessed motherfacker
Allison is a TriHard
money over bitches PogChamp
https://clips.twitch.tv/arteezy/PowerfulCockroachSSSsss
I just smoke these mothafuckas like it ain't no thang
dat luna spam
man fuck this chat "afeect has been timed out for 10 seconds. Reason: Spamming, automated by Moobot.."
come out fanbois
googles dead
@afeect, allison, havoc
i found another shit we gonna play
https://play.eslgaming.com/dota2/europe/dota2/major/go4dota2-europe/cup-87/
register on esl so far.
btw if it ever crosses ur mind its winnable, plz see extended info on prize pool and check whos playing there. still a very good practice tho.
i just played a game where enemy tinker was laughing every 5-10 secs for no reason until i muted him
what the actual fuck
like i was going crazy his laugh is super triggering + i didn't understand what the fuck is happening
??????????????????????
^check reddit, there's a thread about it
basically bind X /laugh, and here you go. the cd is 15 sec, afair.
ye I had a game where my trent was laughing non stop too
i hope this tinker gets cancer
tfw not good enough to play in ayy lmao stack
i'll make my own ayy lmao stack with blackjack and alenari
more like not bad enough to play in ay lmafo stack
I laughed for the rest of the game after 1v5 Lycan rampage.
https://www.dotabuff.com/matches/2455439896
whats ayy lmao stack?
Aimtrong is that a remake of the game? tell me yes!
nah, the remake was done on the 3DS
from my experience A=autism so im not sure you want to be part of that team bruh
I'll make the offical C ayy lmao stack. We're going to be the subs for the subs ayy lmao stack. We're the third wheel of the thread. Also im also convinced that aimstronk is gay.
Edit: kappapride
Can we get more Luna boobs?